Hello, Gorgeous
Rounding into my eighth week of the pandemic, I’m continuing to reflect on the changes in my behaviors and what I think of them. Perhaps the most visible change is in my personal hygiene. (YES, I’m still showering!) I’m not saying that I look like a yeti that’s been on a long backpacking trip. Although, truth be told I have forgotten to brush my teeth a couple of mornings. So maybe I do have abominable trekking teeth. How do you brush your teeth right after your coffee and before you head out the door, if you never head out the door?! But besides the coffee/door issue, I’m all around clean. What’s visibly changed is the clothing, makeup and professional grooming that I’m so used to.
Some days, the only humans that see me are my husband and two kids. On days without Zoom meetings
scheduled, I’m often found in lounge/workout wear, a messy bun and no makeup. Am I alone here? You can’t tell me that you haven’t at least tried a week without pants! I spent a week in “leggins” as my daughter calls them, with just the business happening on the top, for the aforementioned Zoom meetings. After about seven days, I had to really backtrack on the “no pants” positioning though, because it was just making me feel sad. The thing is I love clothes. I love color and prints and textures and clothes that make me feel good (as opposed to just comfortable). I started pulling out my colorful spring clothes and making sure I had jeans on at least some of the time.
The pants thing really made me think. What, besides pants, do I do for my own benefit and what do I do for others? Do the years of meticulous grooming amount to trying to impress other people, or do I care about looking a certain way for myself? My answer was surprising and a little duplicitous. On the one hand, I don’t like to think about myself as a superficial person. So it worries me a bit that when no one was looking, I stopped a lot of my usual routines. On the other hand, I started to feel down about looking so drab, even though no one was really looking. It makes me sad to look down at my nails and see them short, jagged and still sporting just a little of that gel manicure that I had to pry off at home. I’m missing my hair stylist almost as much as I’m missing my mom. I said almost, didn’t I?!
All of this to say that my vanity and I have come to an understanding. We’re not just all about looking presentable in front of others. Although yes, that’s important. Our view is that the well turned out
appearance isn’t the real super power. It’s there to make us feel good about ourselves so that we summon the confidence and poise to go after what we want. That’s the real power. And it’s still important, even when no one’s looking.
So whether I stay in isolation another week or another year, the routines that I want to preserve are the ones that make me feel good about myself- putting on my favorite jewelry, wearing that cheerful floral print shirt, applying a little mascara. And yes, most definitely, brushing my teeth.
What behaviors have changed for you since the beginning of the pandemic? If things returned to “normal” what would you keep and what would you toss out? A coach can be a great partner to explore which aspects of your life are serving you well, and which ones you want to change completely. Reach out for a free exploratory conversation.
