MEETING UNCERTAINTY HEAD ON

I’m a planner. When I decide that I want to achieve something, I map out a plan and go after it. Like when I was in high school and I made a foolproof ten-year plan for career success. Never mind that it went to hell around year six, leaving me with law school debt, no Juris Doctorate, and no new plan. That’s another story. Despite the mixed results of my adolescent career planning, as an adult I’ve continued to persist in my planning. I usually have a plan for the next 6-12 months and beyond. So when the global pandemic hit and there was so much uncertainty that I couldn’t even plan the next week, let the alone next year, it really knocked me down. Much like the time I tripped on a crack in the sidewalk while running Lake Union and face planted and was so mortified that I didn’t want to get back up.  It was that level of knock down. 

During my metaphorical face plant, I started asking myself questions. So many questions. What will the economy do to my business? When will I be able to see my friends again? When will my life expand beyond this maddening three-mile radius? When will these darn kids ever go back to school? I wasn’t sure how to look this much uncertainty in the face and still get up every day and take a step forward. I felt confused and helpless and so incredibly uncomfortable. I missed my plans with fervor and longing. I had to do something. Plan something. I decided to meet all this uncertainty with the 35 mile challenge.

As mentioned above, I’m a runner, if not always a graceful one. I typically run a moderate 15 miles a week. The 35 mile challenge was to consistently walk, run or hike a total of 35 miles a week.

I found that the challenge gave me a sense of purpose in these tough days of change and upheaval. If I was going to make 35 miles a week, I had to get out there and move daily. I had to challenge myself to keep going even when my legs were tired and I didn’t feel like running. I had to plan for the time and incorporate it into my schedule for the day. Notice how the word “plan” is back in there. Ahh, that feels better. I even set up a reward system. If it works for my 9 year old, why not for me? After eight weeks, I got a fancy new pair of running pants with many utilitarian pockets. It felt so satisfying to hit that goal and keep going. As I’m finishing up week 10, I realize that I’ve gained a lot more than increased leg strength and cardio capacity. I’ve gained a sense of accomplishment in this upside-down time in my life. I’ve reminded myself of what I can do when I stretch beyond my comfort zone. Most importantly, I’ve regained some sense of control. Because that’s really what all these plans are about. Feeling like I have some control.

After 10 weeks of succeeding at the 35 mile challenge, I’m still stuck at home most of the time. I still miss my people. I’m still definitely not missing my kids, as they’re crawling the walls 24x7 and finding inventive, annoying new ways to entertain themselves. But the feelings of apathy and uncertainty have dissipated. I’m feeling a bit more in charge of my life.

How did the 35 mile challenge give me the sense of control and focus I needed? There were a few elements that worked well:

• I challenged myself to act on something I had control over.  My weekly mileage was
  fully under my purview, unlike so many other things right now.      

• I picked the right amount of stretch.  35 miles was tough but doable. 

• I chose something I care about. Physical health is important to me, and a confidence booster when I see myself improving.

• I gave the goal a longer horizon. This wasn’t a “one and done” accomplishment, but something to sustain over time.  Hence, the feelings of control and accomplishment sustained over time.

Maybe running isn’t your bag. The 13 year old version of me used to get sweaty and nauseated just thinking about the running unit in PE. Regardless, I’ll bet there is something that you’re passionate about and able
to set a stretch goal around. Is it swimming, hiking, basket weaving, cooking, writing, painting, meditating, volunteering, gardening, or something else? What’s your 35 mile challenge, and what kind of certainty can it bring you in such uncertain times?

Creating new habits and intentions can be tough. It’s much better with a partner! Contact me to learn more about the power of coaching and how I can help you achieve your own sense of focus and control.